Marriage (is the ‘same-sex’ subtext really necessary?)

No, this has nothing to do with my children or their ADHD and mental health issues other than the fact that they see what is happening and have questions.

Ok. I’ve been hearing all the rhetoric both for and against same-sex marriage; I’ve seen Facebook profile pictures change—both supporting and opposing—but I’ve been quiet on the topic of same-sex marriage (much like the gun lobbying argument and the immigration argument and the Obama is the president again whining).

I just want to go on record with my own opinion.

So, here goes, and I don’t doubt that some will find offense. Sucks to be you, then. Get over it, this is my life not yours.

*deep breath*

It seems to me that the primary opponents of same-sex marriage are Christians, and most likely hypo-Christians. You know the ones. They’re like Monday morning quarterbacks: they spout off about “the Bible says….” blah blah blah when it’s convenient or serves their purpose, and the verses they choose are very select. These same people want others to follow their way of thinking, their religious beliefs, their morals and ideals. They are uncomfortable, dismissive, or oftentimes rude, when others don’t follow them into their religious abyss by practicing the same moral ideals. These hypo-Christians are also the same people that condemn those of different religions and faiths; the ones that send missionaries to third-world countries to “convert” people from their native beliefs as if there is something wrong with them in the first place.

This may sound like I’m doing the same thing: condemning someone else’s religion or morals. I’m not. I’ve found myself on both sides of the religious battleground. So I’m more of a survivor than anything else.

Oops. Sorry for the religious rant, but technically it’s all connected.

Pardon me while I collect my thoughts. I have so many things rumbling around in my head that organizing what I want to express is a bit difficult. I fear that this is going to become both a rant about same-sex marriage as well as religion.

*deep breath*

Ok. I have some serious issues with religion as a whole. I have questioned the role of religion in my life and have come to the conclusion that I, personally, am completely comfortable not following any type of organized—or unorganized—religion. God—whether it’s spelled with a G or a g—has no hold over me. And you know what? I’m perfectly fine with that. If other people are uncomfortable with that, then they are the ones with a problem, not me.

Yes, I’m fully aware that this is not how I was raised, but guess what? I grew up. I’m not a child anymore and I’m quite capable of making my own choices, I’ve been doing it with much success for several years now. I never chose my religion in the first place: it was inherited. I realize that my statements may (or may not) come as a surprise to some, but I don’t judge other’s decision to follow a particular religion, I expect the same in return. Politically speaking, the Constitution grants me the right to the freedom of religion, and if I choose to follow no religion, that right is also protected. If you want to call me an atheist, have at. I prefer the term “nontheist”.

That does not mean that I disrespect the religious views of others. Personally, I don’t care what religion someone follows or doesn’t. But I can abide by those that follow a religion and insist on shoving it sideways down the throats of others. This behavior is abhorrent and singularly repulsive and should be prohibited.

Now, with that said, I return to the topic at hand: same-sex marriage.

Although many people seem to be under the impression that marriage is meant to be between a man and a woman, I can’t help but notice that the majority of those people are 1) older, from an age where being gay was deemed deviant behavior best kept quiet; 2) religious (more specifically, Christian); 3) Republican (sorry, had to add that in, and it tends to be true); 4) ignorant to much beyond their own rights.

Over time, views on human rights and what is deemed to be acceptable have changed. In the 60s it was the Civil Rights Movement, both before and after that it was about women’s rights. It seems like the United States is still a bit of a good old boys club: if you’re an older, white, straight, Christian man you have all kinds of rights, but change just one of those parameters and the domino effect begins.

As Americans, we are granted certain rights. The phrase “all men are created equal” should not be interpreted literally in that the word “men” does not necessarily refer to the male gender—the ones with all the rights.

When it comes to marriage, the religious front offers up not a logical, proven argument, but a book.  A book that was written more than 2000 years ago by several different authors (essentially a compilation) who didn’t even agree with each other.  The Christian bible scream about how God—their god—finds homosexuality to be a sin and an abomination. They’re so busy trying to convince people that they are right that they conveniently forget to mention that their faith—and those that follow that faith (Christianity is NOT a religion)—is hardly the only player in the game. Christians—and not even all Christians—oppose same-sex marriage. Fine, oppose it. Go right ahead. But first, acknowledge that others of different faiths or even no faiths, may support it. In fact, they have the right to support it. They also have the right to oppose you.

Marriage is not defined as a religious arrangement only made true in the eyes of god. For a good portion of the population, marriage stopped being about religion a very long time ago. Marriage is a legal and binding contract between two consenting individuals. (I swear, the first person to pop off with the “what’s next, people wanting to marry their dogs … or toasters” argument is going to get a good smack.) Neither is marriage “only for procreation”. Really? Tell that to the ZPG (zero population growth; Population Connection) community or the vast numbers of second (or third) marriages or the elderly that want to live out the rest of their lives with someone. Who’s going to tell them that their marriages are not valid because they aren’t in it for procreation?

Bottom line: if you don’t support same-sex marriage, don’t marry someone of the same sex, but don’t deny same-sex couples a right that you take for granted. Unless someone can provide definitive proof that same-sex marriage will somehow catastrophically change traditional marriage or have an effect on the marriages or relationships of others, then those same proponents need to mind their own business. Those individuals need to stop poking their noses into business that simply doesn’t concern them. Or is it the fact that they are too frightened to explain to their children that love can exist beyond the narrow borders of their belief system?

I support same-sex marriage.

Now, would you like to hear my thoughts on gun control, immigration, or the state of political unrest in the United States?

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